It’s Giving Scattered Diary Entry 📝

I don’t know about you, BUT recently my mind, body and soul have been everywhere and nowhere at the same damn time. My ability to sit down and simply complete a work-related task has gone with the fairies. Prime example, I’ll be writing up an email or blog post and mid-task have this uncontrollable desire to chef up some Peruvian ceviche that requires a quick trip to the fishmonger and the farmers market, where I of course pick up some flowers (because it tis’ the season, Summer chrysanthemums get you some!), and then because I’m in the area I check out some of my favourite thrift stores. LIKE HONEY ARE YOU OOOOKKAAYYYY! You have so much shit to do and you’re trying to self-care Sunday on a weekday (face palms while sipping on iced oat matcha at the cutest of cafes; classic workspace switch-up, a ploy to re-spark the creative flow).

Disclaimer, my self-inflicted circumstance, pitty and privilege is not lost on me. I am very aware of my situational sense of scatter being a total ‘me thing’ and I can get up and WORK BITCH (a Britney ref felt appropriate, am I right?). Alas, here I am, here we are intertwined in this chaotic blog post which is really for no one else’s benefit than my own, offloading the fluffy fog that keeps me away from reaching my true girl boss potential.

Ahh ‘girl boss’ is a term I’ve grown to quite frankly detest, the hustle is hard and in the current zeitgeist of social media it is not the mood. For me, it’s the constant putting yourself out there and the worth and validity that likes, follows, and online interactions have on your mindset, wellbeing (physical & mental), and work ethic. It has come to the stage where I have two separate phones, one with my social media accounts and another with my daily messaging and email apps, simply so I can separate myself from social media to reality. TWO PHONES! like what in the Double-O-Seven is happening.

Another thing that has taken me by surprise is how I’ve suddenly deep-dived into the Co-star app and transcended into the whirlpool of astrology youtube, I kid you not learning about my Pluto in Scorpio was humbling. I don’t really know my stance on astrology yet, other than I find it really interesting and that it provides a kind of comforting feeling, like a weighted blanket if you will, a sense of security that this silly little thing called life isn’t ultimately, absolutely down to me. Could you imagine, so much responsibility!

From what you’ve probably pieced together ‘responsibility’ in my life has well and truly left the building and my Capricorn self is wigging out from the lack of routine (was the star sign stereotype necessary, no, relevant, absolute). So while I cosy up in the corner of this cafe order my second drink; americano, because the jarring bitterness is bound to give me some drive. I’ll start to type and set my intentions and to-do list for the week sprinkled with a few quirky colloquialisms, reminding myself I am very much a millennial. With that said I should probably wrap up this purge of a blog and rattle away at my to-do list aiming to satiate that hand-drawn tick box temptress.

Ciao,

xoxo Tasneem

[Mood board images sourced via pinterest]